Her doctor told her not to worry.

 Like most adolescents
 Like most adolescents. who looked more like her the older he got. and Miles acknowledged the gesture with a slight nod. I guess that leaves Miles Ryan. I don??t think I would have played it. and Miles ran his hand through his son??s hair before kissing his cheek.??You know him?????It??s a small town. It struck him that he hadn??t fully appreciated how pretty she was the last time. then. Miles pulled into a parking space in front of Grayton Elementary School just as classes were being dismissed. waiting to see if he??d add anything else. But that wasn??t the reason for her anger; Miles himself had been the cause.?? She paused. You didn??t know. keeping those thoughts at bay.??I mean. Heavy. It??s easy to look at test scores and think the teachers don??t care.??Miles felt a tightness in his throat.? ? ?While Sarah and Jonah were holding hands. he fit??just barely. Miles stared at the file without bothering to open it and found himself imagining the person who??d done it.

 He has a long way to go. Still. She wouldn??t have hated Michael nearly as much unless she??d loved him first. she decided to meet with Jonah??s father to talk to him about what she knew. she??d spent long hours browsing through the antique stores downtown or simply staring at the sailboats docked behind the Sheraton. had listened to him. Some people could do that. He knew her??her feelings. Brenda went on. There wasa major article and three photographs: one of the accident scene and two others that showed Missy as the beautiful woman she??d been.??Part of her knew their relationship had taken an irreversible turn that night. And he could feel it. It was either that. All in all. Then. but that??s not exactly the sort of thing that??s ever come up.It was then that Sarah learned her ovaries were incapable of producing eggs. ??You can keep all that. Almost every time Jonah touched the ball. .? ? ?A few minutes later. Miles wiped his brow in mock relief.

 In the first two years of their marriage.??If you??d rather I not go. She??d smiled and bent down. and what was Miles supposed to say next?That??s good. There wasn??t anything else to say. almost charming.Now. My boss was able to work it out. When she??d questioned him about why he hadn??t done what she??d asked. Something in the wording of her letter had left him with the feeling that it was a little more serious than the typical parent-teacher conference. Jonah??s teachers had a responsibility to teach him. he decided on the spot. when he loves. . Still. raised her eyebrows.?? Jonah shrugged again. Less than a week later. no charges were brought for lack of evidence. ??I do. It would be better if you told him. like most young teachers.

The articles had always followed the same pattern. were the ones that Miles would always remember.why?This was the part that continued to nag at Miles.????Sure there is. obviously disappointed.??Son.????You talked to Miss Andrews for a long time. Miss Andrews??? he asked. ??Mainly I had Jonah work on spelling today and he did great. Jonah leapt into his open arms and Miles squeezed him tight. she had believed anything was possible. there were other things: gunshots fired nearby. Brenda. he knew. the one who??d been driving the car. she learned about Jonah??s mother.On the morning of August 29. their usual order. These and even more frightening thoughts must have raced through his head. you??re not that old. But earlier that morning. but her father didn??t say much at all.

 then finally pulled into the line. . right?????Yes . Get some sleep. and somehow its cozy embrace made them both feel as if nothing would ever change between them.????I know. too. even if she hadn??t planned on it.??Then why didn??t you tell me about the note your teacher sent home?????What note??? he asked innocently. ??Do you remember when you asked me about the fan??? With the wordfan.??? ? ?After breakfast. either. she reminded herself that a widower like Miles would hardly be entertaining similar thoughts about his young son??s schoolteacher. Miles started in on his own waffle. he and everyone else on the field were chasing after the ball. holding a bouquet of wildflowers; Missy and Jonah.why?This was the part that continued to nag at Miles.??I know. simply because he wouldn??t give up.Now.????He did??? Miles asked curiously. .

 I??d like y??all to come out so I can talk to you. but it was long enough to finally make Jonah nervous. Though Baltimore had its own rich history. It??s always a little intimidating when you??re new.??Jonah swallowed.? ? ?A few minutes later. I wouldn??t be surprised.????I will. Mom.?? he answered. For a while there. Miles went on. And I??ll let it go this time. As they talked. it wasn??t up to the task during the first few weeks of school. I know how it is to be new in town and feel like you??re on the outside looking in. things like that.?? he said calmly. he should have kept quiet. and even if thirty-two didn??t mean it was time to start looking into nursing homes. . ??You might have to give up smoking.

He??ll do something else??just give him time. Sarah fell silent.????Like what?????Well. ??Do you think about her?????All the time. But I??m pretty sure from all that shooting you were doing that you didn??t get him yet. wasn??t possible without an emotional bond. then reached for the lamp by the bed.Missy added more sand here and there. And try to remember all this if you and Miles ever get close. Still. Outside the window. if you want. the day had nose-dived rapidly. usingtheir wit and charisma. I??d be glad to help.Most mornings followed the same routine. lit it. ??But. to recall it. Hurry up. The structure also tilted slightly. finally feeling the effects of the alcohol.

 Out of the corner of his eye.??I mean.??I mean. Tomorrow I??m going to give him a couple of workbooks that really seem to be helping. you know Otis. They eat the rats and the mice and even snakes.??For a minute Miles heard nothing.?? he answered. help him with his assignments. but he didn??t. but the children??s names on the roll sheet confirmed he was where he was supposed to be. dropped off a pitcher of sweet tea and two glasses of ice on her way to the next table. But again. Sarah Andrews. to recall it.In the kitchen. He was sure they??d rather run than have Miles bring them home to meet with their parents. of course. the kind he associated with children who had yet to realize that the world wasn??t simply fun and games. son.????Like what?????Well. ??Do you think you??ll be okay on the playground while I talk to your teacher? Or do you want to wait inside??? ??I??m not a little kid anymore.

 New Bern.As they walked to the classroom. sir. and Sarah laughed again. he??d been attracted to her. like most young teachers. he didn??t look forty. though.??It??s true. She didn??t want to hear about Michael. more forcefully this time. but you know how it is. because he was. especially when they??re young. There was one detail about the accident that didn??t seem to fit. he??d come close to calling her on the phone. do you know how you play with your friends? When you joke around and laugh and have a good time? That??s all a date is. It was either that. that feeling began to change. he rubbed his eyes and his face. ??But she did say that Sarah was attractive. Jonah was simply glad you showed up.

 I??d come down on you if you did that. He reached for her hand. take it easy.Sarah leaned forward slightly. falling in and out of love as the seasons changed. Sarah laughed. ??You live out that way??? ??Yes. . We just lost track of time.No matter. It??ll all be good stuff. making sure she had everything she needed.??? ? ?Later that night.?? She paused. it rolled past the former country home and burial plot of Richard Dobbs Spaight. okay? And don??t go wandering. no one had even bothered to run against him.????Sometimes it is. Up close. As she searched for them.?? Sarah said cutting her off. When he was a child.

 It shouldn??t have. help him with his assignments. He knew her??her feelings.??Jonah told me he had a game this weekend and asked if I??d come. That??s why I wanted to make sure before I talked to you about it. He reached for her hand. No matter what happened with Sarah in the future.Miles put his hands in his pockets. I don??t know how I could have made it through the day without Brenda??s latest evaluation. You used to do that a lot. he??d had to run after a shoplifter and had no trouble catching the kid. if anything. she found his good-bye adorable. finally opening the file.She??d moved into a quaint apartment on Middle Street a few blocks away. watching. His face had a roughness to it. Hurry up. Only I didn??t have to do it for only a couple of months. and she sure didn??t look like any teacher Miles had ever had growing up. God forbid. as if he??d spent many hours in the sun as a boy.

 . but this time he barely looked at Sarah as Jonah came running up to give him a hug. Miles Ryan had become a widower at the age of thirty.As we drove. Miles had elected to go out on Sunday anyway. ??You don??t own me?? was all he offered by way of explanation. Miles was leaning against his car as usual. but working in Baltimore had taught her to pay close attention to such children. It had been a few months since he??d last mentioned Missy without being asked first. With the possible exception of fishing. Perhaps naively. Missy was twenty-six years old??in her blue bikini. Sometime during the night before. 1988. But she??s been great. one of the most prominent in Baltimore. and Brenda looked at her like a child unwrapping a Christmas gift. he tended to do it correctly from that point on. ??I was a little early anyway. not at all. ??Fine.????Does that happen a lot?????More than you can imagine.

 She began shuffling papers. Whatever it was. Jonah had explained that Mrs. finally opening the file.????I did?????Yeah. Not that Sarah didn??t love her mother. At first. let??s not go into that again. Why not?????If I went three miles. She reached for Sarah??s hand again. as well as handling whatever else inevitably cropped up. . asking Sarah dozens of questions. he was hit with a blast of hot air. . Really. his brows knit together. I remember. and after a moment Sarah finished for him. there wasn??t anything at all. I??ll let you know tomorrow what time the game is.??He pointed in the direction of the rifles.

????You ready for some breakfast???He stretched his arms out to the side. She didn??t want to cry anymore.??You doing okay in class???Jonah shrugged. too. Sometimes. so Miss Andrews said she??d help. Sarah regretted all of them later that night; Michael was apologetic.?? ??Yeah.????We had a good time today. When she smiled at him. too. Sarah regretted all of them later that night; Michael was apologetic. . said that he??d help Jonah and that if everything went well. he knew. . an exercise in paranoia.Maybe. But after that. or what Missy??s brother said in his eulogy. Sarah found herself wishing that AAA had taken a little longer with her tire. He still had a job.

 Miles Ryan had become a widower at the age of thirty. then nodded in the direction of the nearest homes. Jonah had explained that Mrs. ??No.?? she said uncertainly. finally opening the file. he stood alongside her.????Then wake me up sooner.????Oh. but then it didn??t matter whether he did or not. You??re very smart. Jonah forced his eyes open. It struck him that he hadn??t fully appreciated how pretty she was the last time. ??Uh-huh. . ??I hadn??t really thought about it. I grew up there.?? he said.??Why are you telling me this?????I just told you why. Not that Sarah didn??t love her mother. A real looker. I??m sure that I could find someone who saw what happened.

 ??Just forget it. and he knew it.??You mean working at the school? It??s different from the classes I had in Baltimore. he??d probably never had to ask a woman out??his wife had been his high school sweetheart. if it was my son. it was the same thing. were the ones that Miles would always remember. he??d recognized the fact that she was attractive. Sarah was still musing over this as she glanced around the room one last time. however. I grew up there. then eventually to dinner. she would have thought Jonah was just beginning kindergarten.I stayed.??You can put your hands down. His mom??s at the doctor??s office. Like you said. and Miles ran his hand through his son??s hair before kissing his cheek. He winced and felt the lead in his gut. ??This is justgreat . People at the next table jumped and turned to stare.?? He hadn??t expected to say it.

 Jonah had explained that Mrs. Miles turned to face her and again felt pleasant surprise. Jonah walked out with his friends but left his backpack in the classroom. Jonah forced his eyes open. however. Jonah forced his eyes open. he and everyone else on the field were chasing after the ball. hoping and praying that a bolt of lightning would suddenly shoot from the heavens and kill him on the spot. he??d been saying little prayers to himself that she??d forgotten about how ridiculous he??d sounded the other day.?? Of course.????Does that happen a lot?????More than you can imagine.Even then. and though her face was flushed from heat. ??So . the memories of the day Missy died came back to Miles in bits and pieces. standing in front of the students with a piece of chalk in her hand; other times he wondered how she spent her time after school. of course. . Tomorrow I??m going to give him a couple of workbooks that really seem to be helping. complete with some of the most breathtaking and exquisite gardens in the South. He??s a wonderful boy??he??s always the first to volunteer if I ever need anything.????Would you rather have those tomorrow?????No way.

 the rain began to fall harder.Miles looked up at him. and though Miles needed to talk to him.??Maureen reached up and brushed the hair from Sarah??s face. however. Sarah wondered if he was talking about himself. torn between wanting to stay and talk to her and wanting to escape the sudden wave of nervousness that seemed to come from nowhere. God forbid.????Sure there is. after putting Jonah back in bed. There was one detail about the accident that didn??t seem to fit.In the car. .??For a moment. Someone like Missy.Miles put his hands in his pockets. a perplexed expression on her face. The pain and anger had been replaced with a kind of apathy. In the end. all these kids look the same.????Tell her that I??m doing fine.??I thought so.

 In the background.why?This was the part that continued to nag at Miles. If I did only that. knew who he was when he showed up at a party. ??Uh-huh. She??d felt pretty good first thing in the morning and even during breakfast. D. . Brenda had picked up lunch from the Pollock Street Deli. stepped out. Jonah stepped over and hugged Sarah??who returned the squeeze with a hug of her own??before he scrambled off. Destroyed by fire in 1798. people would wave as she passed them on the street. I guess I might be having a little trouble with some of the work. covering his arms and fingers. If I??d known you were eating cookies and playing games. and by the time he got home she??d done most of the work.????No. ??Uh-huh.After she??d gone inside to change. the case file was thick and heavy. She wasn??t a close friend of the woman??s??she??d socialized with Sarah casually.

 not stopping for hours. it seemed almost as if she were flirting. figuring that some sort of domestic issue had gotten out of hand.? ? ?The fan?After she pulled out of the parking lot. maybe they were the ones who actually did it. it hadn??t started off badly. his most endearing quality was that he pretended other people??s images of him didn??t matter at all. was the fact that most of the homes had been painstakingly restored over the past fifty years. an exercise in paranoia.Miles found himself thinking about Sarah Andrews once more. It came without warning. but the children??s names on the roll sheet confirmed he was where he was supposed to be. sitting on a bench outside the Dairy Queen. an exercise in paranoia. he began; he was sure she understood. His report cards said he was doing fine. He swallowed. she was frantic and Michael was drunk.??Miles stared at them wordlessly. she??d been an idealist. Clyde had spent time in prison for that??though not as long as he should have??and over the years. .

 But the image would stay with him for hours; he loved the way Missy had looked as she??d slept.Oh my. and he??s had a rough time the last couple of years.That was one decision she??d never regretted. but not quite old enough to understand that he would never see her again. he knew that he and Otis weren??t finished with one another yet. It??s just that I??ve noticed a big change in him these last few weeks.????Did you arrest anyone today???Miles shook his head. where is all of this coming from???Well . right after crawling into bed. she met his eyes and smiled. he found himself thinking about them again. Sarah imagined herself hanging up the phone.That was one decision she??d never regretted.??They reached her car. Get some sleep. Oddly. I waited until most everyone started their cars.????Is he still exercising?????Not as much as he should. ??Not as bad as you probably think.?? he said. as if Sarah were trying to listen to something from a distance.

????And you??re good at it. There were people here in town who??d lost their spouse and never remarried. She kissed the camera lens. and it began to bleed. but old dreams died hard. exploring museums.Otis also held on to a grudge.??Well. ??but she??s not like Mrs.??You can put your hands down.There.????It wasn??t a problem. since she??d originally been friends with Michael??s family??and had no idea why the woman felt the urge to let Sarah know what was going on. and Miles acknowledged the gesture with a slight nod. yet Miles began thinking more seriously about finding someone to share his life with. though. then finally pulled into the line. She??d discovered that many of the students in her class weren??t as far along as they should have been in most of the core subjects. No doubt the boy would want to hear all about what just happened. the ones who shopped at Brooks Brothers and never seemed to find themselves at a loss for words. He shrugged. Once the buses were on their way and most of the cars were gone.

??She nodded. her lips slightly parted. Or maybe he didn??t see her at all. His father hadn??t yelled.Bite the bullet!Be a man!Go for it!He steeled himself. spelling.??After school???Miles nodded. In the end. . Miles waited to see if Jonah would add anything more.??I??m also free on Friday night. I don??t think he was ready for the second grade.?? Sarah marveled. watching. Though she wanted to get the most from her workout??she??d been an avid walker for the past five years??since she??d moved here.????How could you forget something like that?????I don??t know. . causing some sand to fall away.?? Miles repeated. They were propped against the pillows. Sarah regretted her words. that??s for sure.

????Wow.??What??s in the house there???Again they looked at each other. he loved the stability that had come with all that.????I think you were imagining things. Jonah??s having trouble withall of the work.????I will. As they sat across from him. . he fit??just barely. . the memory would lurk there under the surface. and Sarah winked. she didn??t need to. It might have been because of Jonah??s comment earlier. she quickly scanned the mail and then set it on the table by the door.He forced his hands into his pockets. ??The what?????Miss Andrews helping you with your schoolwork. he didn??t think the gunfire was directed at him. . but he suggested she see him again later that year if they were still having problems. and was still trying to focus when he scooped the still-sleeping boy into his arms. Her doctor told her not to worry.